No time to cook

I love food (which if you’ve read previous posts you already know). I love to eat it, to prepare it, and to share it with others. I enjoy experimenting with recipes and making new dishes, tweaking them to my preferences. I often say that food is my love language. Suffice it to say that I know my way around a kitchen. I know how long it takes to make foods that are I make often, and I’ve got a good idea of how long it takes to do other basic tasks. Boil water. Chop vegetables. Melt butter. Sauté onions. Based on all this experience, I also know that the time estimates included in recipes are never accurate.

Who are the people who come up with these times? Is there some rule that says you have to underestimate by at least 50% or no one will try your recipe? Good grief. I have a recipe that I’ve used for years for “Five Minute Hummus.” Who are they kidding? It takes me at least five minutes just to haul out the blender and make sure I have all the ingredients (even though it’s only four). Locating the tahini amidst all the bottles and jars of condiments I have collected may take me ten minutes all by itself (longer if I make sure it hasn’t expired before I use it). Last night I tried a new recipe (which was delicious) from a cooking magazine I regularly receive (see previous post about the joys of mail). The recipe said that the time required was 15 minutes active time, total 25 minutes. Seriously? I added up just the specific times mentioned–cook pasta for 7 minutes (doesn’t count the time for the water to boil), cook flour in butter about 2 minutes (not counting the time it takes for the butter to melt), cook sauce 4 minutes more (after adding stuff and bringing to a simmer), bake in oven about 10 minutes (after mixing everything together). That right there is 23 minutes. (Who says you don’t use math in everyday life?) And maybe this test kitchen is in some sort of time warp or is like the kitchen at Hogwarts where you just wave a wand and everything is prepped, but that’s not how my kitchen works (unfortunately). It takes time to find the 12 ingredients, and measure them, and chop things, and melt things, and whisk them together. I can’t just snap my fingers and the sauce immediately is simmering. Even folding in the pasta takes time. At least I can use the “unattended” time while the food is in the oven to clean up the mess. (Last night my long suffering, dish washing husband asked if I really used all the prep dishes I had out or if I was pranking him.)

I know all this. So how come, even with that knowledge, I’m still late getting dinner on the table? Must be a wormhole in my kitchen.